BEDWETTING
Causes, Prevention, and Controls

PLEASE NOTE: Loss of bladder control, or loss of bowel control normally indicates that there is something wrong going on inside of your body. You really should see a doctor and confide in him/her as to what is going on and let him/her try to help you. (Exceptions would be if you have never been potty-trained, or you have 'untrained' yourself.)

1. BACKGROUND
2. DEFINING BEDWETTING
3. SOME CAUSES OF BEDWETTING
4. PREVENTING A WET BED
5. CONTAINING THE PROBLEM
6. DAMAGE CONTROL
7. DIAPER TIPS

BACKGROUND: Queen Victoria gave a bad rap to many body functions that are quite normal. Suddenly peeing, pooping, intercourse, etc was very bad and shameful. This attitude is still prevalent today for many folks. Given their druthers, they would probably never go through the shameful experience of peeing or pooping. There are, however, many people who have no compunction about whipping out their penis and letting the pee fly whereever it is convenient. They would probably poop the same way if it was easier to clean up afterwards and not leave 'racing stripes'.

This deeply engrained Victorian attitude is what leads us to the quandry that bedwetters are in. For your family the fact that you have a bladder control problem is an embarassment that needs to be hushed up, just as it would be hushed up if you were certifiably insane and committed to an insane asylum - you would never be mentioned again. So, the attitude is that if they don't deal with the problem, if they don't admit that there is a problem, then there is nothing to be embarassed about. After all, you are keeping that thing in your pants when you are in public, and no one knows about the wet bed except you. So, the old ostrich approach to life impacts on your life and your real life problems.

So, let's talk about various ways to deal with it!

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BEDWETTING: For our purposes, let us define bedwetting as the act of unconsciously urinating (peeing) while you are sleeping. Whether the bed actually gets wet, or preventive steps are taken, doesn't matter for this discussion.
Bedwetters, as a general rule, find it very uncomfortable to wake up in a wet bed. They find it to be very embarassing and humiliating. It is difficult to talk about it with anyone else, especially family and friends. What follows are some of the various ways that are possible to deal with bedwetting.

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SOME CAUSES OF BEDWETTING: There are many causes or reasons for bedwetting:

• Stress
• Excessive alcohol consumption
• Puberty
• Inadequate muscle control
• Others

STRESS: Excessive stress during the day will cause you to be so exhausted that you sleep so deeply that you are not aware of peeing. You may find that excessive activity, either mental activity as well as physical activity can lead to a very deep sleep, a sleep that is so deep that you are not aware of peeing until it is all over. And, quite often this is in the morning because emptying your bladder has relaxed you even more!

EXCESSIVE ALCOHOL: What is excessive? That depends on you, and your previous experience in handling alcohol. The most severe case is when you have consumed so much alcohol that you are completely passed out and lose all control of all of the motor functions of your body. For most people, drinking alcohol will relax them, and this is one of the reasons that people will have a drink after work - to unwind after a long hard day. So, the stress that you built up during the day that could cause bladder control problems (as well as bowel control problems) is replaced by alcohol's ability to make you lose control.

PUBERTY: A significant number of teens experience bedwetting as a part of their journey through adolescence. Perhaps it only happens occasionally, perhaps it is quite often, perhaps it is nearly every night. With the significant number of teens that are experiencing bedwetting, there seems to be a certain amount of normalcy for a teen to wet the bed from time to time. Probably, the best course of action here is to try to simply control it and to not get too uptight over the fact that you are having bladder (or bowel) control problems.

INADEQUATE MUSCLE CONTROL: There are two muscles that control the output of your bladder. When your bladder starts getting full, sensors send a message to your brain that the bladder needs to be emptied, and the brain then controls the relaxing of those muscles, usually on your command, and the pee comes out. Sometimes things get in the way of those signals.

• Some medications will inhibit, or even block, those signals. As the bladder becomes more and more full, the pee forces it's way out of the bladder and you are wetting involuntarily. This can also happen during the day.
• Sometimes an allergic reaction to something will have the same effect.
• A very deep sleep will prevent the signals from properly registering in your brain.

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PREVENTION: The most natural course of action is to work on preventing the bedwetting.

1. Control Fluids: Make it a rule to never consume any fluids once supper is over.
2. Regularity: Have your evening meal at a fixed time everyday. Have your bedtime at a fixed time everyday - at least 3 hours after supper.
3. At Bedtime: Go to the bathroom and pee just before you get into bed. Try very hard to get your bladder totally empty before you go to bed.
   NOTE: If you can still feel some pee in your bladder after you have gone all that you can, (at any time, day or night!) this may be an indication of an obstruction or infection of some sort in your urinary tract, or a problem with your prostate gland. This definitely needs the attention of a doctor!
4. During the night: After sleeping for about 4 hours, get yourself awake, using whatever alarm system is necessary to wake you up, and go pee. Some people find that keeping a pail beside the bed and peeing in that during the night makes this easier. You can probably just roll to the edge of the bed and lift the pail up so that your penis is in it and let it go. When you are finished, just put the pail back on the floor and roll over and go back to sleep. You may need to do this 2-3 times during the night - depending on a variety of things.
5. During the day: Avoid all beverages with caffeine in them. Caffeine is a definite urinary tract stimulant.
   For beverages during the day, stick to natural fruit drinks and water. Cranberry is reputed to be good for the health of the urinary tract.

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CONTAINMENT: If you are unable to make the prevention steps work, or you don't want to establish that sort of discipline in your life, or you are too embarassed to discuss it with your doctor, then let's talk about containing the pee after it comes out.

• DIAPERS: Diapers are the most popular containment solution. There are a lot of factors to having a diaper be successful in containing the pee.
  
  1. Your normal sleeping position when you are wetting.
  2. Your penis position when you are wetting.
  3. The amount of absorption material in the diaper around the head of your penis when you are wetting.
  You may find that diapers tend to leak when you wet during the night. You may find that wearing plastic pants over the diaper is necessary to completely contain all of the pee.
• EXTERNAL CATHETER: This is a latex sheath that slides over your penis, just like a condom. It has a place to attach a tube at the end, and you can run the tube into a collection device at the end of the bed. There is a strip of double-sided foam tape that is used to secure the catheter to the penis and to prevent leakage. These are quite economical, and very safe to use.
• McGUIRE URINAL: This is a complex, but very effective appliance for both the daytime and nighttime collection of urine. The penis fits into a latex pouch that has a waistband and leg straps. It looks similar to a jock strap with a giant condom coming out of it. The output of it connects to a bag that is fastened to your leg and the pee is collected in the bag, to be emptied later at a convenient location. Although these are not cheap, they are reusable and will last for a long time. When used during the day, they eliminate the need to rush around to find a place to pee, just let it go.
• INTERNAL CATHETER: If not used properly, these can be very dangerous. They are very effective, however, in removing all control from you about your pee. They slide up into your bladder through your urethra and bypass the control muscles. The output comes out of the end of your penis and usually connects to a tube that goes to a leg bag, or to a collection device at the end of your bed. When used properly, they are very comfortable, quite economical, reasonably safe, and convenient. More catheter information

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DAMAGE CONTROL: If you are unable to make the prevention and containment steps work, then let's talk about controlling the damage after you have wet.

1. MATTRESS COVER: Get a plastic mattress cover to put on your bed. Put a padded mattress pad on top of it. That gets rid of the noise and slipperiness of the plastic cover. If you do leak during the night, you are going to have to wash the pad, but the mattress will be protected. The pads are relatively inexpensive and easy to change. You might want to get several mattress pads and sheets so that you don't have to do laundry every time that you kose control.
2. USED DIAPERS: Promptly dispose of used diapers. They stink! You may not be able to smell them because it's your scent, but other people can. Get them out of your area and into a dumpster within minutes/hours of taking them off. When you change your diaper, make sure that you use wet wipes, or otherwise thoroughly clean your diaper area. This not only avoids diaper rash, but it eliminates stink. Put your wet bedding in a plastic bag and tie the top securely. Launder it as soon as possible. Preferably the same day. Same reason: the stink! If people can smell that distinctive aroma of dried pee, they are going to come down on you. If you are clean about it, and people can't smell you, they are going to be a lot more tolerant if they should find out, and there is a lot less chance of them finding out if you don't stink!

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DIAPER TIPS:

1. For daytime use find diapers that are reasonably quiet and yet absorbent. Order one of the sample packs from The Diaper Store if you aren't sure.
2. During the day wear only black, baggy pants. Being baggy, they will cover the bulge of diapers. Being black, if your diaper does leak, only you will know it, until you sit down and soak a chair :-) You may find that wearing plastic pants will keep the chair from getting soaked.

3. DIAPERING FOR THE NIGHT TIME

   You may experience leakage out of the side of the diaper. If you have your penis pointed up, you may experience leakage out of the top of the diaper.

   • Try to position your penis so that it is down between your legs and the pee will come out near your butthole.
     This may be difficult to do if your penis is small when it's soft.
     This position may be painful when you are hard.
   • You may find that pull-on plastic pants over the diaper will keep all of the pee in and not leak into the bed.
   • Typically your penis will not stay in any particular position while you are sleeping and it may gravitate to your side where the diaper comes together.
   • Take a booster pad and fold it in half, like a tent. Then place it over the end of your penis and inside of your diaper. This keep the splashing of the peeing from going out the top of the diaper as well out of the sides of the diaper.
   • Take a baby diaper and with a sharp knife, make a few slits vertically in the plastic. On the fabric-like side, make a horizontal slit in one end. Then, thread your penis up inside of this baby diaper. Now, diaper yourself as you normally would.
     This keeps the pee from splashing around and coming out where you don't want it to. The slits in the plastic lets the pee flow out into your regular diaper. This also gives your diaper a lot more capacity, as well as feeling good on your penis.
4. Try to be yourself. Try to not be furtive. Try to not be paranoid about it. Try to accept the situaton.

As you try these various tips and techniques you will find the right combination of things so that either you won't pee during the night, or else it will all be contained and you will wake up to a dry bed in the morning.

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